the one way or the other
March 27, 2015 - single portrait
a few years ago i ran into a group of teeange punks on one of munich’s largest public transport stations. i talked to them for a while and asked for portraits. i was with them for about half an hour shooting, talking, laughing, bit flirting to make those kids smile and feel comfort who had these sad faces lost children have … until police officers showed up for an identity check and questioning which ended with a dismissal for the whole group. i was able to take two more shots of the questioning scene and then had been stopped by a serious warning.
i cannot tell you much about this girl. i know her name, her e-mail-adress and that she likes pink. she had a calm voice, a serious face but without the unrest and insecurity i observed in most of the other’s kids eyes. she without any fear she looked straight into my face and what i saw was just this: a silent beauty, open, honest and without significant secrets to hide. a look of a young adult with some experience, an attitude and a future plan. i hope i am right and she is now on a good way to create a satisfying future. i saw others who weren’t that lucky. the decision (if you have one) for the one way or the other is often too easy to take. while the one feels like fun and relaxation in the first place one day you start freezing on the street in winter times, you run for drugs all day and worse. the other feels like square mindness, subordination, pressure and unfreedom in the first place before you aim your goals of personal wishes, career, domestic happyness and whatever. the gap between the one and the other can be very, very thin and hard to see. when i was with those kids on that station this particular afternoon i saw both in most of their faces. each of them already went a few steps in one or the other direction.
i often thought of coming back to that place. normally stray kids come to the same places time and again even when they get dismissed or arrested. they are creatures of habit more that “ordinary” people. sometimes i was quite close doing it. but, to be honest, i am afraid to see the same kids with different faces. i am afraid to find them. i am afraid to meet this girl again. because that would mean she took the wrong turn. i prefer to imagine her on a surfboard with her hair in the wind, laughing and taming waves …